Of Teddybears, Fairy Tales and Things that go Bump in the Night

Californication is back for its fifth season, and now we're several episodes in and I'm all caught up. **SPOILERS AHEAD***  It starts out a couple of years after the fourth season ended. We're all done with Hank's probation over the statutory rape of Mia and hopefully she won't pop up again. But having said that, one never knows. Karen is married to Richard Bates (you may remember him as the psychotic drunken writer who likes to show his schlong at inappropriate times), Marci and Stu are still together, and they have a child Stuart, who is actually Charlie's son, conceived after his vasectomy was found not to have taken. At the age of two and a half, Stuart doesn't speak, which disturbs Charlie, but Marci says it's normal. And now Becca, Hank's teenage moody daughter has a boyfriend. And damned if she didn't pick a guy just like her old man. Which he learns, when he catches said boyfriend cheating on her. What's Hank doing? He's writing a script for a rapper named Samurai Apocalypse, who's making the transition to actor, and it's called Santa Monica Cop. Don't dare compare it to Beverly Hills Cop, Sam gets really ticked off. On the flight from NY to California to see about doing this project, Hank meets a lovely lady on the plane and they do it in the bathroom. Of course, being Hank, Karma bites him in the ass when he discovers that he just boned Samurai A's girl.

Besides sharing custody of his son, Charlie isn't doing very well in the romance department (not that Hank is doing much better - he broke up with a girl in NY who turned out to be all kinds of crazy and torched his apartment, played by the actress who plays Winona Hawkins on Justified). Charlie's problem is that he treats women the way he sees them treated in the porn he loves - and that doesn't get him very far.  Now let's talk about Charlie for a minute. As an agent, he's had his ups and downs. If you'll recall, he was fired from one agency because he was caught too many times in the act of self-love while in his office. Hank's his main client, but Hank had a dry spell. And then the whole Mia stealing his book thing. He worked briefly for Kathleen Turner, who demanded he service her when she wanted it. It was through her that he met Rick Springfield and Marci got to have her fantasy fuck. Then there was the whole Vagina Town debacle, and his liason with the girl who became the porn actress.

 In last night's episode, Charlie got a long time wish when he and Hank went with Samurai Apocalypse on a ride along with the police department, to prepare for the role. Of course things got horribly fucked up. The policeman had a seizure at a donut shop and they had to call 911. At that point, they should have taken the car back and found something else to do. But that would have been sensible, right? Especially after Samurai learns his girl, who left him two weeks before, is out with some dude. Things go from bad to worse. After that, Hank gets a call from Becca. Her bf has gotten Richard drunk and he's exposing himself in public. In attempting to deal with that, the bf recognizes Samurai as one of the group that beat the shit out of him after Hank caught him cheating, and now Becca and Karen think he had something to do with that, which he didn't. And then Charlie ends up getting a blow job from a tranny hooker, which Hank and Samurai are bound to never let him forget.

Charlie Runkle. Yes, he's not perfect, far from it. But there is something about him. He's a teddy bear. He's cuddly and adorable. If I had to choose between him and Hank for dating purposes, sorry Hank, but I'm taking Charlie. Hank is not only hopelessly in love with Karen, he's also incapable of commitment and being in a long term relationship. Charlie has possibilities. I think with the right woman, he'd settle down and be a great husband and father. He has very pretty eyes. And bald is sexy, so yeah...

Grimm is still going strong, and I hope it stays that way. I enjoy the stories, the writing and acting are good. It's a definite twist on a police show, and I know there are interesting things ahead. I especially enjoy the relationship between Nick and Monroe, his werewolf friend. In one episode, Monroe suffered bodily harm from other supernaturals because of his relationship with Nick. But he decided he wasn't going to give in to their pressure, he'd help Nick all he wanted to. The make-up and cgi work is really great. The last episode was based on Hansel and Gretel and concerned a black market for human organs. They take familiar fairy tales and give them a modern twist. I'm not sure what the ratings are, so watch it while  you can. It's definitely worth it.

***SPOILERS***Once Upon a Time is getting really good too. After the death of the Sheriff, Emma was elected as his replacement, to Regina's dismay. Mary Margaret and David try to fight their feelings for one another, as David is trying to be a good husband to a wife he doesn't remember, but their love is too strong.  After a storm, Regina has had Henry's secret play area torn down, to his distress. And his book is now missing. Emma tries to catch her in misappropriation of town funds, but only succeeds in making her look better when it's revealed that she's planning a park for the children, including Henry, to play in. Emma turns to Sidney, whom Regina has cast off, to help her take the Mayor down, and we learn about Sidney's story - as the wicked queen's one time lover who became the genie in the mirror. What Emma doesn't realize is that Sidney is not what he appears to be, and he's still in Regina's pocket. A stranger has come to town, and Emma and Henry both wonder why and who he is, cause strangers never come to Storybrooke - other than Emma. I suspect he's Henry's father, but we'll just have to see. Sunday nights on ABC - definitely worth watching.

Top Chef Texas is winding down, hopefully they have a great replacement waiting in the wings. Not the best Top Chef season they've ever had. In last week's we were down to five chefs, and I was afraid Edward was going to be axed, but he's still in. I'm really happy that Beverly got taken out, I just hope she doesn't come back with that little survivor thing they have going on after each episode. I think we'll find out this week. Apparently, she beat Nyesha, so let's hope someone beats her or we'll see her back again. I'm rooting for Edward all the way!

There is a new Restaurant Impossible this week and a new Chopped. Looking forward to those. No Iron Chef America, instead it was a night of Cupcake Wars. I watch that sometimes, but it's of limited interest. New Alcatraz tonight, looking forward to it. I'll talk about the new season of Vampire Diaries another time.

Until next time, take care!

♥ Julie

Even Bad Boys Face Consequences

Look at that face. How can you say no to it? Most women can't. Maybe that's his problem.  For those of you who don't recognize him, that is Hank Moody, author, bad boy and all around sexy guy - the foundation upon which Californication is built, the sexy comedy on Showtime now in its fourth season.

Hank Moody is the ultimate badboy. He does what he wants when he wants to whom he wants. He's a perpetual Peter Pan who's never grown up and doesn't plan to. Why should he, when his extended childhood is just too much fun? He's never even held an actual job in his life, as he admitted in this week's episode - he's never had a boss, his admission rather blowing his attorney's mind.  Oh, if you haven't seen this week's episode, then possible spoilers ahead.

Let's show him in action now:

He's irreverent, irresponsible, and wickedly funny.  Sexy as all get out too.  I think he must have a clause in his contract (David Duchovny, that is, the actual actor that plays the character) that he gets a partial nude scene in every episode.  Not that I'm complaining, mind you, it works for me. This week was with her attorney. We got to meet her boss this week, and he insisted on taking Hank to the golf course. Watching Hank in a yellow golf shirt was priceless - and what he did on that course will have you rolling and wiping your eyes. (Not giving everything away, don't worry).

But even the biggest bad boy has to face the consequences of his actions. Life can't be too easy for them, and Hank is no exception. If  you've been following the show from the beginning, you know that he hooked up with a girl at one of his book signings, took her to bed, and while they were fucking, she punched him - twice. Imagine his surprise to later find out she was only sixteen.  She did seem a lot older and she never said a word. Not only that but her dad was, at the time, engaged to Hank's ex.  Damn touchy situation. Naturally he didn't confess to what happened, but perhaps he should have, cause the truth has a way of coming out, and the longer delayed it is in that coming, the uglier it gets. But before it does, Hank polishes his dormant writing skills and actually pens a novel - a thinly veiled autobiographical novel of the cathartic type about what happened, which he titles Fucking and Punching. The young lady in question, whose name is Mia and is played by Madeline Zima (who also appears in the last season of Heroes as Clare's roommate), spots the manuscript and steals it, and then has the temerity to find an agent (Hank's agent Charlie Runkle's ex-assistant, but that's a whole other story there) and have it published under her name, to great literary acclaim. Shit happens and the truth does come out, but with a price - Hank, who has reconnected with his lady love, loses her and his daughter too.  And oh, he gets arrested for statutory.

Other actions bring other consequences. His relationship with his daughter Becca is an emotional rollercoaster. Becca is a damned emo Goth girl who looks like she could happily hang out with Lydia Dietz of Beetlejuice. At times she is more mature than her father, but at other times I just want to punch her, especially for that doom and gloom attitude of hers. Negativity breeds negativity, sweetie! Just saying!  Hank's ex, Karen, is actually a gorgeous woman, and very cool. She does put up with a lot from him, and he does put her through hell.  He doesn't seem able to be faithful. He needs to learn to keep it in his shorts. But that's part of his bad boy charm, right? And how he does charm the ladies, he really does.

His agent, Charlie, is cute too - not quite as charming, but he has his own sweet personality (although he has moments when he is a major tool himself). Let's look at Charlie.

He's adorable! In the first season, he got fired from the agency he worked for - they caught him on camera too many times whacking off in his office. Later he has a dom/sub relationship with his assistant (the one who later represents Mia) and at one point he falls in love with a porn star of the film he produces - Vagina Town. He goes to work at another agency where his boss, superbly played by Kathleen Turner, demands he service her!  Charlie is a bad boy too, just not in the same league as Hank - and with more and worse consequences.

Bad boys - how we love them. But if  you don't give them consequences, they become one dimensional and boring. No one is perfect. No one is all bad either. A touch of humanity goes a long way.

Who are your favorite bad boys and why?  Tell me, I'd love to hear!