Friday, May 17, 2013

Hop Against Homophobia Blog Hop

TGIF and welcome to the Hop Against Homophobia Blog Hop.

Prejudice of any wrong is just wrong, and is usually based on fear and ignorance. Many people fear what they do not understand, or what they perceive to be a threat - either to themselves, or to their way of life. Many peoples have been targeted with such ignorance over the years - for their race, for their religion, and for their sexuality.

It's time to stop the madness.

Spread the word. Prejudice will not be tolerated any more. Usually, those who are ignorant enough to believe in these things do so because they think they have someone else's backing. Let them know that they are wrong. Explain why they are wrong. Because people are people, and love is love. And no one should be allowed to tell you who to love.

There have been great strides since last year at this time, more states taking a stand and legalizing same sex marriage, because it is the right thing to do. But there is still a ways to go. DOMA needs to be stricken from the books. Then it won't matter if every state allows same sex marriage - they'll be legal in all, regardless. And maybe then the states that say no will realize there's no point, and they may as well do what's right.

Last year, I told you about my experience with homophobia. I'm going to repeat that story here. Homophobia can affect anyone, and it does.

When I grew up, there was a lot of prejudice against black people. Even though segregation was over, it was still there. People don't change overnight and they don't change easily. I grew up in white neighborhoods, and didn't see a black person in my school until I was in the fifth grade. Why? I don't know, that's just how it was. What I remember from then is my father telling my mother that her sister, my aunt, could not bring her current boyfriend to our house. Why? Because he was black.

Prejudices are just stupid and they're wrong. And yet they exist because too  many people are content to say nothing and do nothing, either from ignorance or from fear. Or because they think it doesn't concern them.

But it does. It concerns everyone. Intolerance of someone is an intolerable situation, and one we can rectify.
But you have to want to do it, and you have to be willing to open your mind, and heart - and use your brain.

Homophobia is far too rampant in this country. The far right will tell you homosexuality is a choice, but it isn't. It's how you're born. It's hardwired into you, like eye color, hair color, etc. The bottom line is that you love who you love.

So what are they afraid of? I've noticed that it's more often the men that bear the brunt of the displeasure, although not exclusively. Men seem to have a higher "tolerance" for women who love women. In fact, it often fuels some of their fantasies. But let it be two men and watch the denials start to roll. What are you afraid of? That perhaps you too could love a man? Is that such a bad thing?

The problem has only gotten worse in recent years because these ill-conceived attitudes are being handed down to the children, at a time when more and more young people have found the courage to speak out, to question and accept and deal with their own sexuality. And they are being bullied for it by narrow-minded young bigots who parrot their parents' unadulterated messages of hate. Too many of our children have died, taken their own lives because of the bullying.

It has to stop!

Being homophobic is every bit as wrong as being prejudiced against people of color, or people of a different faith, or  people of a different race. You can dislike someone for who they are as an individual, but don't hate because of something like sexual orientation.

There are some people, such as the wrong Reverend Fred Phelps, who preach messages of hatred and carry them to extremes. There are members of Congress who also spew messages of hate. They think they are conveying the word of God - I'd love to be a fly on the wall when they arrive at the Day of Judgement and realize just how wrong they've been. When did they decide that God hated people? What right do they have to spread their lies and prejudices under His name? Somehow, I don't think He'd be amused.

And then there are people like my brother. I worked for him for over thirteen years. I did payroll, bookkeeping, billing, scheduling - everything but income taxes, and I even helped with those. I made it possible for him to spend little time in the office. When he got married (for the third time, I might add) and he and his new bride were on their two week honeymoon, traveling around the eastern seaboard and Canada, I didn't even tell him I got very sick, I still went into the office and took care of business so I wouldn't disturb him. I knew he was born-again Christian, but I didn't let it bother me. We had gay clients, and he acted like he liked them. But the signs were there, which I chose not to see, I guess. Like when I told him on the phone I'd gone to see Brokeback Mountain and he started to lecture. It all came to a head when my first published book, To the Max, was released. Silly me, I was so proud of holding my book in my hands. I took it to the office and showed it to him, held it out to him. I didn't want or expect him to read it, but just to wonder at what I had done, to admire it, and to have nice things to say. He wouldn't even touch it. Like it was the lowest form of human excrement. It wasn't long after that he "laid me off" because of having less work. While it's true we lost our biggest client, that was his fault, not mine, for something he didn't do.

Update: I started working for a temp agency last June, but the work is sporadic and not stable. However,
I've been at my current job, with National Elevator Inspection Services, for five weeks now and it looks like I could be there for a while. So things are looking up. I still have not spoken to my brother since he fired me, which is almost three years ago now.

Don't be afraid to stand up for what you believe in. The Power of Love is a wonderful thing, stronger than those who hate.


I will give to three winners a copy of anything from my backlist. And one winner will receive a $10 Amazon GC. What do  you have to do? It's simple - follow my blog, and tell me the name of my first published book. See?  Easy. And don't forget to include your email address, otherwise your entry won't be valid. If I can't reach you, I can't very well give you a prize, can I?

To learn more about the International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia, go here
To follow the rest of the Hop, go here..

The hop will continue until the 27th.  I have some guests lined up during this time, so I hope you come back
and see what they have to do. I will be posting on this topic again.

Now, get out there and take a stand!

Until next time, take care!

♥ Julie


  1. Thank you for taking part in the hop! I'm a follower :) And your first book was...To The Max.

  2. Looked up on GRs--To The Max should be your first >.<

    Thank you for the chance!


  3. Your first book was To the Max! I'm sorry your brother was so blinded by fear that he couldn't celebrate his sister's status as a published author. sigh. I love your images here! I've never seen this one: marriage is not a human right, it's a heterosexual privilege!" I LOVE THAT!
    I think it's obvious that bible-fuelled objections to marriage equality have no place in our legal system.
    brendurbanist @gmail .com

  4. To the MAx was the first book and I follow through GFC. Great post with wonderful images.
    debby236 at gmail dot com

  5. Great post (though that whole saga must have been rough)! Your first book was TO THE MAX, and I follow via e-mail...


  6. I believe Evil Stalks the Night was your first published book. I just signed up to follow you by email.


  7. Napsized Dreams was your first published book! Thanks for the giveaway! jepebATverizonDOTnet

  8. Lovely post. Thanks for being a part of the blog hop.
    I'm sorry and sad that your brother is blinded by his own... fear or ignorance or blinding himself with his 'religion'
    ....but I hope that one day, someday, He'll say he's sorry.

    already following.
    ;) and the first book you published was To The Max.


  9. Thanks for sharing your experiences and taking part in the blog. It means more to me than ever since my youngest child came out as transgender male. I pray that he will not run into the cruelty of prejudice, but it will do doubt happen. Here's hoping for a better world! 'To the Max' was your first book. I'm subscribed to your blog. Thanks again!

  10. Sorry you have such a stinker for a brother. I follow thru GFC and the first book was the one you showed the stinker To the Max.

  11. Just became a follow of your blog via email. Thank you for taking part in the hop and for the great post. I love those pictures. To the Max was your first book and it was a great book.

    humhumbum AT yahoo DOT com

  12. Thanks for the post, I now follow your blog. Your first novel was To the Max, which I recently received free from Dreamspinner and am about to start :)

    peggy1984 (at) live (dot) com

  13. Your first book was To the Max <3 And I follow your blog :)

  14. To The Max was your first book.

  15. To The Max was your first book. Your brother sounds a lot like my brothers ans sisters. Great post! Thank you for taking part in the hop!
    sstrode at scrtc dot com

  16. To the Max was your first book, and I've followed you a while by email :)

    It's your brother's loss. Unfortunately he'd rather be right then loving.

    Thanks for participating in this great hop!


  17. Hi! Thanks for being apart of this fantastic hop! Im sorry you and your brother had such a falling out. I hope things get better for you. Its very hurtful when our families cant accept something about us. Its sad how some people are. Im happy to say, im glad were all different! I think being brave enough to say you love someone, no matter the sex, is amazing! People should find there happiness. Who cares what others think. The only people that matter, are the ones in the relationship. Too many people in this world are simple minded. And your first was To The Max! Gorgeous pictures! The people look so happy! Thanks for sharing! Have a wonderful night!

  18. To the Max is your first book. Also, I follow your blog by GFC as Emily. Thanks for sharing your story and for participating!