This
story struck a personal chord for me. I suffer from depression and I felt this
subject just doesn’t get the attention it deserves. I am hoping my story shed
some light on a condition that’s very misunderstood. –Lily
Blurb:
Harry Goldberg appears ordinary. But he secretly suffers from
depression–leading life alone except for his cat. Then Harry meets a new
delivery man where he works–someone he is attracted to. Can anyone love
him–emotional baggage and all?
Excerpt:
Harry had a wonderful job; he worked at a deli on Long Island. He loved to watch the looks customers gave him when he served them his special mile-high sandwich. Despite the huge piles of hot pastrami and corned beef on rye with a pickle and coleslaw on the side, they somehow left a clean plate.
Harry had a wonderful job; he worked at a deli on Long Island. He loved to watch the looks customers gave him when he served them his special mile-high sandwich. Despite the huge piles of hot pastrami and corned beef on rye with a pickle and coleslaw on the side, they somehow left a clean plate.
The
people around Harry told him that he was a likeable kind of guy with a great
sense of humor. All his co-workers loved him. Truth was, he had them all
fooled. When he left the deli at the end of the day he went home to an empty
apartment; his only company, aside from assorted houseplants, was his cat. Tom
was a grey and white shorthair Harry had rescued from the local pound. No one
knew about Harry’s lonely existence, just like they didn’t know he suffered
with depression. The only ones who knew, aside from his immediate family, were
his counselor and a support group he went to from time to time.
Most
people thought it was just the blues; at least that was what his parents
thought at first. His mom was the worst. When Harry was fifteen, he’d buried
himself in his bed and wouldn’t come out. She kept telling him stop being lazy,
get his ass out of bed, and snap out of it.
Unfortunately,
they didn’t understand what it was like to feel as he did. No one knew how much
Harry wanted to be normal; he didn’t want anyone’s pity. No one could know the
deep pain he felt. Some days it got so bad he just wanted to lie down, go to
sleep, and never wake up.
* * * *
Nicholas
could never stand being cooped up inside some stuffy office building. Nope,
that was never going to happen. So when his uncle offered Nicholas a job with
his delivery company after he graduated high school, he jumped at the chance.
That was almost ten years ago–driving a truck was in his blood now.
Stern’s
trucking specialized in delivering kosher food to all the Jewish delis and
kosher markets on Long Island and in the five boroughs of New York City.
He
checked the manifest; there was a new restaurant on the list. He’d been to
Carle Place before but never to Nosh Deli. But a job was a job. He’d done so
many deliveries he could do them in his sleep.
He
loaded up his truck in Queens Village and headed east to Long Island. He took
the local roads, completely avoiding the Long Island Expressway.
* * * *
Harry
was handling the lunch-hour-rush crowd. He’d lost count of how many pastrami
and corned beef sandwiches he’d made and how much homemade coleslaw and potato
salad he’d scooped out onto the plates.
“Can
I have a chicken on whole wheat bread, please?” Harry stopped his
automaton-like movements, taking notice of the customer behind the voice–a
blonde woman who appeared to be in her thirties, dressed in business
attire.
“Bless
you. Thanks for breaking the monotony.”
She
laughed. “You must get tired of the same old orders every day.”
Harry
was on the receiving end of that brilliant smile. The woman seemed to be
flirting with him. He had to admit she was an attractive woman. He noticed
there was no ring on her left hand. There was one problem, though–Harry was
gay. He’d known that girls didn’t do anything for him that way since he was
fourteen. It was one more thing his mother had nagged him about–dating
women–until he came out to his parents. He couldn’t say they were thrilled, but
at least they didn’t throw him out of the house. They just didn’t talk about
it. Besides, Harry hardly ever went out. He had one experimental encounter with
a buddy in high school. They had given each other a hand job and that was that.
Harry’s
self-esteem was in the basement. Who in their right mind would want to date a
guy who was a killjoy? Depression robbed Harry of being able to really enjoy
life. He was glad no one at work was aware of the sad sack in their midst–and
no one would find out if he could help it.
He
buried himself in work, fixing orders for people like the woman who stood
before him–he wouldn’t let anyone get too close.
* * * *
About the
Author:
Lily
Sawyer has to credit her late mother for her interest in reading and writing.
She used to take her to the library and opened up to her the world of books. She
took a writing class in an adult enrichment program and got hooked. She started
off writing stories set in various fandoms she was interested in like Star Trek
and Brokeback Mountain. After getting some encouragement from family members and friends, she finally decided
it was time to write her own original stories. Lily recently returned to
drawing and was in an art class. Also loves to garden and loves everything
about nature. Including going to the beach and looking up at the stars
You can purchase Lily's book at Silver Publishing!
Thanks for stopping by, Lily!
Until next time, take care!
♥ Julie
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