DIY is the Better Way to Go

This morning, I found myself facing a small dilemma. Nothing major as problems go, rather more annoying than anything. The taskbars at the top and bottom of my screen refused to stay in position, no matter what I did. Now I knew that if I asked my daughter Sarah, she'd be able to help me out of my situation, even if she grumbled about it because I'm pretty sure she's told me how to do it before and I'd forgotten. But she was asleep, and I sure as Hell wasn't about to wake her to ask her. I prefer to live, thank you.

So I did the most logical thing - I googled the problem. Found an assortment of answers, some of which were germaine, some not. The most relevant involved locking my taskbar, not auto-hiding it, etc. I tried their suggestions, and still nothing worked. I was getting frustrated, but I didn't give up. I kept looking and looking, and then I noticed a small box which was checked - I think it said exit full screen.

Durp. I unchecked the box and problem solved.

Now, my point wasn't to show you how computer illiterate I am (although sadly true), but to show you the satisfaction of figuring out a problem yourself. I felt like I'd won a victory, albeit a small one, because I'd applied actual logic and perserverance and found a solution. Of course, not everything in life is that easy. But then again, who wants it to be? People who have things that come too easily to them tend not to appreciate them, and take such things for granted.

Money is a great motivator. In its pursuit, we become damn creative at times, doing what we can to keep afloat. If you're born with it, the motivation isn't always there, as is evident if you check out the infamous scions of wealthy people. They're not all bad, of course  not, but some of them are just plain wastes of space. They think life consists of pleasures and having fun. Their idea of reality is not real at all.

I get annoyed with some of the people on a particular FB game I play because they're always whining - I need this, give me that, blah blah blah. While I don't mind helping people with extra items if I have them, I think these people are missing the point. Didn't they start playing in order to enjoy playing the game? Looking for the items is part of that play, and if you get everything too fast, then you end up not having anything to play.  It's not the destination, folks, it's the journey that counts.

One of my favorite mottos comes from a Chinese gentleman named Lao Tzu:  "Give a man a fish; feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish; feed him for a lifetime".  

How true, how very true. I'd rather learn how to fish and be able to apply the techniques for myself, then have someone give me a handout.  The same holds true for the things you know, that you teach to other people. If you're going to tell someone they're wrong about something, explain why, so they can avoid such an error in the future. I strive to do that with my editing. Of course, I'm not perfect. But I do welcome questions, and if you ask, I'll give you my reason for what I said.

I think some of the biggest problems in my life have come from waiting for someone to do something that I need done. I went without heat for three winters because of promises made by different people, offers of assistance that never came about. The sad thing about being poor is you can't afford certain things, and this was one of them. So we stayed cold. Very cold. But finally, in the third winter, a suggestion from a friend led to getting heat and hooray for warmth, cause it's wonderful! I ended up boosting the process, instead of sitting back and waiting for it to happen. I'm very glad I did.


I think from now on when issues arise, I'll google them and try to find solutions online that I can apply. There is a wealth of information on the Internet, and generally help on any given topic. If you're willing to look, and if you're willing to apply yourself. I may not be a plumber, but by golly, I'll learn some of their tricks to help me fix things. Nothing too major, of course. I'm not stupid enough to think I could wire my house, or put on a roof (that also has to do with a fear of heights).


But I'll never know what I can do unless I try. Although, I'm also wiling to accept help, if offered.

DIY - better than give it to me any day. 


And what I learn, I'm more than willing to teach so you can do it yourself too!


Until next time, take care!


♥ Julie

If you can't stand the heat, you're not going to make it as a writer

In previous blogs, I've discussed the importance for writers of having a support system in place, either in the form of betas or a critique group or both. I also have friends who read what I write, but honestly, their value is more limited to telling me they like what I write which, while nice, isn't helpful in the how can I improve myself category of the writing process. Most friends don't want to offer criticism for fear of offending, and that's fine too. It also doesn't hurt to belong to online groups too, to find other like-minded people that you can bounce ideas off of, and do a back and forth sort of dialogue regarding your work, their work, and so on.

But go into it knowing this much - you may very well hear things that you don't want to hear about your work. I'm here to tell you, if you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen!









I was in a situation recently where someone posted a WIP that was completely unedited and when I offered a couple of comments, I was accused of being mean. Probably because I didn't fall all over myself telling the person how wonderful it was. But isn't what you need when you join a critique group criticism? So why cry when you get it?

Face it, we none of us are perfect. That's why we have editors (who are also our punishments, but I'll save that for another blog). Wouldn't it be wonderful if every word that proceeded either from our pen or from our keystrokes was just the way we envision our story, with no changes needing to be made, best-seller material ready for an eager publisher to welcome with open arms and a huge advance?

Life does not work like that, though, and neither does writing. Writing requires a lot of thought, a lot of work, a lot of spit and polish, and hard examination - reading and re-reading, and going over. That's where the others come in, the crit partners/betas/idea bouncers - they help with that process by providing a fresh pair of knowledgeable eyes which will be able to see what your myopic too subjective eyes cannot always see.

No one likes to hear that what they've written needs to be fixed. You have to go into it, though, with the idea that your writing will need changes, whether for grammar or spelling or context, or plot, or getting the details right. How embarrassing if you decide to change your hero's name for whatever reason and don't discover til after publication that you missed it in a few spots, and now you've really confused your readers.

I find that overweening hubris is often - but not exclusively - the purview of the very young writer (and young doesn't necessarily refer to age, but to writing experience). I admit - been there, done that. I can remember a time when if you dared to suggest my work was less than perfect or needed something, I'd have a hissy. I got over that, and I learned to develop a thicker skin, and to appreciate the advice I was given. (FYI that doesn't necessarily extend to reviewers, but again, that's another topic, cause they aren't there to help you write, but to guide their readers).

So I'm mean for speaking the truth? Okay, I can leave with that. It doesn't make what I say any less truthful, and once you get past that youthful arrogance, maybe  you'll see it too. Or not, your choice.

Do you have to accept everything people tell you in terms of criticism? Of course not. Not everyone is right, and what they are offering are opinions, some of them more informed than others. Sometimes you have your own reasons for using the words you did, setting up your situation the way you did, etc. But sometimes other people are just right. I'm still learning to edit my own work, as well as the work of others. How? By doing. I take what people say to me and apply it to others. I'm learning to tighten my writing, cut out some of the fat and watch out for repetition (other than when I'm making a point). Sometimes it takes someone else to point out that  you have a tendency to abuse a word or phrase. Once you hear it, it's easier for you to see it. For example, in To The Max, it was of course and naturally, and as I did the edits, I saw that yes, I used those far too much. With a friend and fellow author, it's the phrase a bit (which I have banned from her writing lol)

You can make this process as difficult as having teeth pulled, and as painful, or you can look at it as a learning experience whose goal is to improve your writing. Frankly, I want to improve my writing, to be the best that I can be, so I leave my ego at the door. Now, having said that, some things are too much to take, such as suggestions that I change my main character (this in a sequel, no less, so he's an established character) or the suggestion that I change my writing style (seriously? if the publisher didn't like my style, I have to believe he wouldn't have selected my book to publish). So yeah, there's some of that grain of salt thing in there too.

The important thing is to be willing to listen, and to take the heat. Think of it as a trial by fire, one from which you'll emerge safely from on the other end - perhaps a little worse for wear, but whole and enlightened for the experience. If you offer criticism to someone, be nice about it - no need to get rude or snippy (save that for the reviewers). Show consideration for a fellow author, but also be truthful. Telling them what they want to hear isn't going to help them a bit.

Have you ever offered assistance to someone and gotten your head bitten off for it? I'd love to hear about!

Remember, there's a contest going on here - all you have to do is follow this blog and leave a comment with your contact information, and you're entered! The winner will receive a copy of one of the chapters from my ongoing series Captivations, to be selected by the winner!  Hurry and enter, contest ends Saturday!

♥ Julie